"You taught me that not everything is stupid. Some things are gay." Mr. Show

Wow. There are so many things qualified for this page, it's almost mind-boggling. Let's see how many things I can come up with. I really hate all of this.

Linda's List of Hateful Celebrities (more to be added soon, I'm sure)

Jennifer Lopez Or "J. Ho". There simply aren't enough negative adjectives to describe this talentless skank. Her music is abyssmal, her acting amaturish. I can admit she's got a great body, but so what? There are a lot less annoying babes who aren't talentless whores. Yeeeeeuck.

Victoria Beckham Those of us in the States don't have to be subjected to this waste of space. I swear, though, the UK is obsessed with her. I don't get it. Yes, she's married to a stone cold hottie (David Beckham), but she was a Spice Girl. And she's a complete and total biooootch. Make her go away.

Metallica I suppose I could admit they have musical talent, but since I think their music sucks, I won't. I could have given them props before the whole Napster debacle, but since then, I spit in their general direction.

Mariah Carey The woman is a nutcase who is well studied in the art of vocal masturbation. I thought for sure her 15 minutes were up when she went all nutters on TRL, but damnit if that skank didn't come back. At least, unlike J. Ho, she has some talent. Some.

George W. Bush Not a celebrity, per se, but definitely the worst thing to happen to this country since I was born. He makes Nixon look like Mother Theresa.

Paris Hilton Proving once and for all that rich people can be white trash.